So, for christmas, I recieved a copy of Sid Meiers Pirates!. Now, I love this game. Like most Sid Meier games, you get a great amount of freedom. However, theres something thats been bugging me... Y'see, one of the features of the game is that you get to romance the daughters of all the governors in the game. Now, when it comes to this, I am the Pimp of the pirates, dating every woman I come across.

However, I've noticed an odd little trend...

*Sails into port*

Governor: "OHNOES! My Daughter has been kidnapped by the no goodnick colonel Mendoza!"

Me: "Eh, I guess I've got nothing better to do. I'll go rescue her... After I do some stuff."

*3 game years later when I finally go rescue the chick*

Mendoza: "So, you've finally found me for the 80th time!"

Me: "Dude. Do we have to go through this EVERY DAY? Would you just stop it already?"

Mendoza: "I don't know what your talking about. >.>"

Me: "Dude. Seriously. This is getting old."

*Runs him through*

Mendoza: "OHNOES! I AM DERFEETED!"

Me: "That's what you said the LAST 79 times..."

*Rescues the girl*

Daughter: "Oh Sir Jonathan! I have been dreaming of this day! Lets head home to talk about our future together."

Me: "Allright, lets... wait, what?"

*Takes her home*

Daughter: "Oh father, Sir Jon rescued me! And next time he visits, I think he may have an important question to ask you!"

Me: "Er, yeah, right... About that... See babe, it's like this... When a man and a WoMYGODIT'S A 3 HEADED MONKEY!"

*everyone turns to look*

Me: "YOINK!" *Runs for it!*