If your children can't behave and you don't have the balls to tell them to shut the fuck up, then why the hell are you idiots bringing your children to the movie theater in the first place? And why, for the love of all that is holy, are you bringing six year olds to watch Batman Begins or Fantastic Four?

P.S.

Dear studio suits...

Comic book fans are the kind of people that will nitpick about Magneto's hair being a slightly lighter/darker shade in a panel, or that Peter Parkers shoes are laced incorrectly when he *clearly* uses a half-hitch instead of a sailors knott.

So why the hell do you expect us to buy that Jessica Alba could be a brainy scientest? She barely makes a convincing Jessica Alba, for LaserJesus's sake!